A year ago when our mother suddenly passed away, she told me in her last hour that she was a happy go lucky girl. She also told me not to be sad because she had a good life, she knew she was well loved, and those she loved knew they were loved too. I had never heard her call herself a happy go lucky girl before and took a mental note. Since then, I have spent a good deal of time thinking about what is a HGLG.
hap·py–go–lucky adjective \ˌha-pē-gō-ˈlə-kē\: not worried about anything; cheerfully unconcerned about the future. “a happy-go-lucky, relaxed attitude” synonyms: easygoing, carefree, casual, free and easy, devil-may-care, untroubled, unworried, lighthearted, laid-back.
That is absolutely who my mother was. I thought, why wouldn’t more people want to be like that? My sister and I need to be more like that, and as I discussed the idea with friends, they too wanted to learn how to be more like that. That’s when we thought we had something to share with others. I thought about the way she lived her life as such a great example of not letting the negatives take you down. Not by telling us how to live our lives, but by showing us.
It was late fall and I knew she would have wanted me to transplant her roses to my house for safekeeping. It was like I had a little voice urging me on in this mission. She loved her garden and tended it often. She had roses from her mother and her grandmother (and quite possibly great-grandmother). I was concerned that with winter coming if her house were to sell, I could not let go of those roses. They meant something to me even though I did not yet know what.
In the year that has past, I still don’t know much about tending to roses, but I am learning. We transplanted 14 rose bushes of all sizes and colors into one sunny location that I can appreciate every day.
My lessons are many and on-going.
Transplanting them helped remind me even when I am broken-hearted, I can choose to cherish and salvage. Waiting on the first blooms of spring, I often documented my progress and updated my brother and sister on how they were doing; giving the three of us something happy to focus on together.
Gather ye rosebuds while ye may,
Old time is still a-flying;
And this same flower that smiles today
Tomorrow will be dying.
Protecting them from disease and nurturing them made me think about how to care for myself and what I need to thrive. I knew I needed to lighten my load this past year and show some extra kindness to myself. I made a point of seeking out time with my strongest supporters.
When I am pruning, I am thinking about letting go of what no longer helps me grow. It might mean letting go of people that are negative around me or behaviors that are not helping me become stronger. What is causing me stress that I can change for the better? What do I need to let go of? What do I need to keep?
Today I will be putting the garden to bed for winter and it makes me think about– A Time for Everything, For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest.
Then it hit me; these roses are the bright spots in my life. It is a powerful message to me to focus on the bright spots when I can recognize them. Sometimes they come with thorns and need tending and nurturing to bloom, and sometimes I can share them with others. For me, nothing makes me happier than to be able to share my joy- it has and will be time well spent.
“I am my mother’s garden. Her loving legacy.
And time can’t touch the many gifts she gave – they live in me. “
Ellen Brenneman
What are your bright spots?
(Aspiring to be a) Joy Spreader
I love this so much Suzy!!
Some of my bright spots would no doubt be either the sunrise or the sunset. No matter where I am at the time, the sunrise or sunset will stop me in my tracts and force me to see and feel the beauty. Along with that beauty, I immediately reflect on moments observing them with my family in years past. To this day, my son in California will send me texts of the beauty he gets to see. I ofen do the same, while also sending texts of our sunrises to my husband during my early morning walks with a dear friend. My husband often will pass a beautiful sun on to me in a text when he can catch one. Our surroundings, a freebie from above, gives me some of my greatest joy and the desire to pass it along in an effort to share that beauty with others.
Cheryl what you wrote here is exactly the kind of inspiration we are hoping hoping people share. Sharing ideas like this makes me what to do the same with my family. It is another way to keep us connected with each other. As the swedish proverb goes, “Joy shared is doubled and sorrow halved.”
Happy tears for you, Nancy & Robbie, what a beautiful legacy for such a beauty gal!
Some days we must burn something to keep the light shining. I will try to burn my dark cloudy thoughts!
Thanks for this fun site
What a beautiful tribute to your mother and to life itself. It’s so true that life can be compared to a lovely rose bush, with its thorns and all. While some might shun the bush because of its thorns, others like yourself cultivate its wonders and glories and share them with others. Your mother must be so comforted knowing just how much her life has impacted yours and so many others. She must have had a deep relationship with God, knowing well to savor the present moment and knowing that He is in full control. <3